Seriously Bad Movie of the Week Prequel

Posted: August 10, 2010 by eg in General
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

If you’ve read my FECAL System of Unemployment, you may remember that having Netflix is great during joblessness. Suprisingly, I’ve managed to watch a ton of really awesome movies that I hadn’t previously heard of and haven’t experienced any bad ones at all, thanks mostly to Netflix’s rating system. Under each movie it tells me what they expect me to rate it out of 5 stars. This thing has been so ridiculously accurate I occasionally feel the need to prove it wrong by rating the movies I watch a few stars lower or higher than what they thought I would say. I’m sick of them being right. Assholes.

Bad. Like awesomely bad.

Anyway, I feel that its time to watch some bad movies. Not just “meh, we should have watched the other movie instead” type of bad. I’m talking about the “hey, lets go buy a gun then either I shoot you and then kill myself or you can shoot me and then kill yourself. Either way, as long as we both die soon” type of crappy movie. Imagine watching Battlefield Earth with your left eye while watching Gigli with your right eye. That bad.

I consider myself to be quite the aficionado of crappy movies. My resume includes, among many other things, being fully versed in nearly every episode of MST3K, ordering Battlefield Earth at a hotel with my older brother when I was 13 and laughing at nearly every scene, and getting my girlfriend to watch Fast and Furious 3: Tokyo Drift at least three times between freshman and sophomore year of college. I can easily tell the difference between funny-bad, so-bad-it-was-funny-but-became-bad-again, and just flat out bad-bad.

The Plan

I will be watching a terrible, and I mean really terrible movie regularly, like once a week regularly, and write a review of it in the morning. If you’ve seen MST3K episodes, it’ll be just like that, except I am not being held captive on a space station and forced to watch bad movies, I’m doing this to myself.

The first movie I will be watching is 2012: Supernova. Although it hasn’t been rated on Rotten Tomatoes yet, all signs point to this being one hell of a bad movie. And this isn’t the 2012 movie that had John Cusack in it. This one has 2.3 stars out of 10 on IMDB and a predicted 1 out of 5 stars and some very hatefully written reviews on Netflix. Starting the movie now, review coming in the morning.

Haven't seen it yet, but expecting the worst.

Review of a seriously bad movie coming soon…

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